Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
