what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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