Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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