Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
