i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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