So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
