I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Did you pee in the oven last night??
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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