I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
