At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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