all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
