Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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