We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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