She said her name was "party"
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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