I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
