is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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