I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
