Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
