i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
