Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
