actually, I'm a sock model
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
