You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
you told grandpa to call you daddy
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
