I just saw a hot homeless man
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
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