Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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