You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
