So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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