At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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