They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
