She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize