the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
