how hairy? two words: wookie tits
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize