Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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