Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
