For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
