Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
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