I want to stick my p in your. b.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
That accounts for only three of the penises
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
