Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize