Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
