I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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