JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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