The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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