Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize