Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
