i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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