Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
