toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
