Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
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