i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
he thought i was a dude.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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