he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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