guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
