We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
