I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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