just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
